I have found myself thinking this thought lately…
“I might not be here for X next year.”
A few things that have been “X” recently:
My Birthday or anybody’s birthday for that matter
Opening Day of Georgia Football
Any special event for my nieces or nephew
Thanksgiving Dinner with the family
I think the “I might not be here for X next year” thought is turning into the “I just might not BE here next year” thought.
Yeah, if I move I should be able to come back once a year to visit family and friends but for the most part I will be what we like to call “out of pocket”. (Only electronic hugs, not real ones)
It’s a funny feeling to think about having long-distance relationships with your family and friends. And it will be interesting to see how my relationships change and grow if I move. I know the close friendships I have will remain strong.
But I wonder about family.
I have not been very close to my family through the years, especially my parents. Although I have always been physically close to them (never more than 40 miles or so) I have never been that emotionally close to them.
But that has really been changing over the last year and a half. I finally feel like I am making some progress with my family relationships and here I go and possibly leave the country.
Sometimes I think…Is it possible to grow closer emotionally to my family by moving physically farther away from them?
Still, I have this strange feeling inside that if I do move over 3,000 physical miles away from my family that yes, I will somehow grow closer to them in emotional miles.